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The Jaded Gamer: PK Thunderstruck - by MikeTheEBGuru

The Jaded Gamer: PK Thunderstruck

NBC primetime hit Scrubs isn't as entertaining as these past few days have been, and you better believe this malicious rambler has something to say about that; 'bout time! The old adage that best things come to those who wait hasn't really tickled my fancy these past few years, but now, now things are different. As a rather uneventful Nintendo enthusiast, I'm going to be throwing around more money these next few months than the local mob boss, and you better believe I'm going to be twice as shrewd. Let's analyze my projected expenditures for now until September, shall we? Sure events occur in real time, but this is in no specific order, and yes, tangents are in vogue.

First, I will be importing the Mother/Mother 2 GBA funk this Summer. I don't understand a lick of Japanese, have no interest in the language or culture, and I doubt I'll even open the thing for some time. That's right, I'm more than willing to pay out those equally rough import prices just to look at the thing. Now, at around this point, you're probably thinking that I'm just your everyday spoiled brat that is willing to use his parents' hard-earned dough to get whatever he wants. Zip it, Trebeck. I'd like to think I'm one of the more frugal EarthBound fans around in that I bought the game with The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past, Streets of Rage 2, and Cyborg Wars (golly, now that's a game that needs a sequel) all for the low price of fifteen bucks. I also had my GBA and Gamecube launch budgets set up over a year in advance for each with money I had won from a writing contest sponsored by those stern yet happy go lucky State Police. If video games won't get the kids off the streets, what will?

Computers. This is a big time for the community, and my top priority is to mount a comeback, and be back on a daily basis this Summer. Sure my job will hamper this, but I'm going need the job to get a slightly larger sum to fix my already dusty computer. Having that great, exceedingly more frugal P1 to Celeron upgrade may also be in store. Call me a cheapskate, but Beyonce's got nothing on this independant woMAN. Toss in a little RAM, a consistent 56k connection, and the obvious Windows XP action, and you've got your self a fully revived member of this thriving community. It's a great time to hang around, and the last thing I want to do is spend more time on the offline sidelines.

Is that all I have in store? Pishaw. Despite already having a perfectly wicked GBA, I can proudly say that I'm tossing in more money for that SP. Headphone stuffage, and the rest of the works aside, I want that immersive EarthBound experience on the go. And what about home? The equally lusty GBA Player for my Gamecube. If this entire article is starting to seem more and more like an advertisement, Nintendo should be happy. If I'm going to be spending hundreds because of these new GBA announcements, you know at least a few of you non-tightwads will take it one step beyond. Is it getting better, or do you feel the same?

Let's say I've got my fair share of friends that flat out hate the game. One day in Geometry, I turn to my friend Jeremy. I says to Jeremy, I says, "Psst. IT'S BEEN YEARS! YEARS! EARTHBOUND GBA GAMES WERE ANNOUNCED YESTERDAY!" *insert train conductor "Choo Choo!" arm motion*. Yeah, I'm sure the Geometry teacher gave me a weird look or two, but I honestly couldn't notice. Maybe making faces that would make John Gruden cry (it's all in the nose) made me oblivious, but I'm straying from the point. I made the weird face because I heard young Jeremiah's response.

"Mike, that's cool, but EarthBound's graphics were yucky."

Yucky. How in the name of the Boston Bruins did the term "yucky" slip back into the teenage psyche of young, healthy geometry students? Furthermore, how'd the term "yucky" begin to apply to EarthBound in any way, shape or form? The Toledo Mudhens? Yucky. EarthBound? Cleary not yucky. The opinion didn't bring me down much, but a certain non-fan almost caught a protractor with their face that day. That poor graphics stimulus just won't be there for the critics this time, and I don't mind doing a little hardcore, grassroots campaigning for the thing when and if it's announced for North America. Should be fun to see how many of us step up to the plate.


Other Submissions by MikeTheEBGuru

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MikeTheEBGuru The Jaded Gamer: Sensible Cohesion
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7/31/06 10.00

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